Knowing the Doctrine

Last week in Gospel Doctrine class, we had a discussion about the verse in the New Testament, John 7:17. "If any man will do his will, he shall know of the doctrine, whether it be of God, or whether I speak of myself."

Well, the teacher began by sharing a somewhat negative experience of how he didn't necessarily have a testimony of fasting but he was called upon as a missionary to teach the principle, but then he asked the audience if we had any positive experiences of doing, or obeying a principle and gaining a testimony thereby. Well, before anyone answered, I posed the question if it's necessary to have a testimony of each principle. So the teacher opened the question up to the floor, and we got quite a few similar responses, that you can get by knowing a few things and the anchors of the gospel will help you with the principles you are struggling with.

Then he turned it back to me because he supposed I had an answer on my mind. And I did, building on one of the comments, I suggested that the doctrine is that Jesus is the Christ and that by obeying commandments, regardless of if we believe them even years after starting, we get a testimony of the doctrine--that Jesus is the Christ. So it doesn't actually matter if we have a testimony of tithing or of fasting, etc. The core doctrine is what we're striving for, so essentially, we can testify of the commandments we keep because they fit into the puzzle. That's the essence of what I said. But I have to admit that I didn't feel quite right about asking the initial question or even of my answer, though it still made sense in my mind.

After leaving church, I had an image come into my mind, some symbolism, which is often how I think. This time it was of an animal--it could be any animal, but it was an elephant, which seems to be a go-to animal for plenty of analogies for some reason--maybe because it's so big, you can't ignore it. :). Anyway, so the thought was this, if you can see a foot of an elephant, you can be pretty certain that the animal it's attached to is also going to be an elephant. So, if I needed to surgery on the elephant, I could be certain that if I opened it up, I would find an elephant's heart or an elephant's brain because the animal before me was an elephant. So, do I need to see the whole elephant, every piece of it before I know that the heart is an elephant's? No. It's only logical that each part be that of an elephant.

So, if I see a foot and step forward feeling and looking at the elephant, just as I step forward and keep more commandments, even if I can't say with certainty that the commandment itself has brought me blessings, because it's part of the elephant, part of the teachings of the gospel, it must be true, too.

Everything seemed clear in my mind, but I was still not feeling quite right about it, so I continued to ponder and then I found a hole in the theory. What if you'd never seen an elephant before? How would all of this apply? Then the little story of the blind or blindfolded men who had never seen an elephant and were all placed at different points of the elephant and were told that what was before them was an elephant. One man said elephants were hairy. He was feeling the end of the tale. One man said they, no, they're not hairy. They're solid like rock. He was feeling the tusks. Another man said they were both wrong. Elephants are wrinkly. He was feeling the side. And so on.

If they were blindfolded and had the blindfolds removed afterward, they could see they were all right. Elephants are hairy because they're mammals, and they have parts that are hard like rocks, and they are wrinkly. For someone who has never seen an elephant, even if they're told that every part must be an elephant and they can assume this logically, that still won't tell them much about the core doctrine--what an elephant is. They have to experience each part of the elephant to have the whole picture.

So yes, it's true that you don't have to have a testimony of each principle, per se, in order to testify that the whole of the gospel is true. But the Lord does want us to know what the blessings are for the whole gospel. He wants us to see the whole elephant. But it might not come right away. Sometimes we have to be blind for a while and just experience the tail, or just experience the tusks because those are the parts that are important for us at the time. But we do have to keep obeying the commandments we can't fully see the benefits of yet because otherwise, we never will and the elephant will remain only a tail, and really, the whole elephant is so much more majestic than the tail.

End of Year Letter 2018

Dear Friends and Family,

What a year this has been! To keep me from rambling too much, I’ll break down my year according to a few categories.

Work: I’m still teaching at Front Range and have been working in the Writing Center as well. But I needed a little more, particularly for the breaks, and I felt the Spirit prompt me to apply when I saw the position posted, so in November 2017, I started working at Moroni Books, a local Latter-day Saint gift and bookstore. It was particularly helpful during the summer. For the first summer in many years, I didn’t take any classes to teach since our family reunion overlapped with the last week of school. The owners, Norma and Jerald, were grateful to have me for the summer, too, because in May we became an independent Deseret bookstore, which expanded our size and inventory, changed some of the rules and operations, and involved a lot of learning and a lot of work. At the end of the summer, I was promoted to Assistant Manager.

 

School: Having had the feeling that I needed to continue my education and then finally having the idea that perhaps improving my French would be useful since I’ve been teaching continuing education classes in French for several years now, in January I began an online Master’s program in Romance Languages, emphasis in French through the University of New Orleans. I took two classes that spring semester and two more in the fall. But now I’m looking to transfer to a different school where I can take classes in the old-fashioned, brick and mortar kind of way so I can have more opportunities to speak the language. I’m looking at a few schools and will be applying soon.

Church: For the first half of the year, I continued my service as the Loveland Stake Relief Society secretary, working with some wonderful women whom I love so much and miss! But in April, the region created a Mid-Singles’ group (a small congregation of singles between 31 and 45) that was to be hosted by a ward in the Fort Collins stake and serving 8 or 9 of the surrounding stakes, so I had my records moved there. Nonetheless, it did take some time for the Loveland Stake to replace me, so I continued on, serving there as well as I could for another few months and then trained the new secretary who I am sure is doing a fabulous job. In the Mid-Singles’ group, I was called as the Music Chair, a calling I’ve never had, but which my mom has had a few times and even currently has. This means I get to choose the hymns for sacrament each week and try to find special musical numbers for sacrament meeting. I also try to coordinate the schedules of the music directors and organists. It’s been a fun learning experience, giving me the opportunity to get to know different people, which is always the highlight of any calling.

Play: A nice perk about the Mid-Singles’ group is that there are now more activities geared to singles in my general age range. I’ve also tried to keep helping out the singles’ program in the Loveland Stake by hosting games after the monthly single’s temple night since I was one of the most involved on the committee before the Mid-Singles' group started. Fortunately, this month they just called a new committee, so I can step down from that as well.

Another fun thing this year was the Robert/Wanda Quist family reunion we had in August. We had some fun in a rented house my brother David found for us in a podunk town in Utah. It was fun getting to see everyone and learn a little about our family history, too. David asked to have family history-country-based meals for two evenings we were there, so we had a Swedish theme one night and an English theme the other. To correspond with those meals, he asked me to put together something to help us learn about our ancestors, so I had a little fun researching my grandparents and some of their lines and trying to gear an activity to a wide range of ages.

Health: I think I’ve missed more church this year than ever as small things keep coming up. It started in May when I had an emergency appendectomy that resulted in not only losing my appendix but also my gall bladder. I guess having so many abdominal surgeries over the past several years made it difficult for the surgeon to find a good way to get past the gall bladder, so she nicked it and took it out. But now, I don’t believe there are any more organs that can be safely removed from those areas, so hopefully the surgeries are done. That wasn’t my only surgery, though. I also had something put in! In April, I actually got a new tooth, an implant for a tooth I had removed last year. Don’t forget to go to the dentist regularly! It’s very handy. It’s also helpful to have a water pik and floss every day.  I didn’t miss church for the tooth implant, though, just for the appendectomy. But I also keep getting sick with other little stuff and throwing out my back. Is 45 really the top of the hill still? I think I might be on my way down.

So there you have it.

Wishing you all the merriest of Christmas seasons and a splendid new year! May the Lord bless you all. I know He loves you more than I and can do more for your life than you can imagine.

Lots of love,

Heidi Quist

Evidence of God, of Christ, etc.

Earlier this week I had a student come into the Writing Center working on an assignment from his learning community Philosophy/English class regarding the atheism/theism debate: Is there a God? I happen to know both of the teachers and I don't think either of them is a bad person. To the contrary, I might call them my friends, and I recognize a lot of good in them. But my reaction to the specific question prompt for the assignment was that it was flawed.

The assignment was for the students to create a dialogue that they might have with a child regarding the existence of God based on the philosophy of someone whose name I don't remember, but whose main idea is that we should only teach children to believe things for which there is sufficient evidence. The students were also instructed not to include their own opinion. I'm sure you can see the difficulties already.

Of course I have to acknowledge that I'm not taking the class, so I don't know what the teachers have presented on the subject, nor am I familiar with the philosopher whose name I don't even remember (though I did help the student with the first assignment regarding this philosopher). But, from my background with analysis and understanding of philosophy, the assignments puts forth an impossible task.

First, it would require a definition of God that all can accept--because if I am to teach a child to or not to believe in something, then I need to have specific parameters, but most especially if I am going with the negative route, as this student seemed anxious to do, even though he claimed to be a believer himself. So, to be clear, if I am going to teach someone that they cannot believe in God, I need to specifically outline what they are not to believe is possible. Can we come to a consensus that all can agree to about what God is? Given the number of religions in the world, this is a daunting task. Not impossible, though. The fact that there is a word for this enigma indicates that a general understanding can be come to, but it would take some deep thought.

The next thing the assignment would require would be a definition of evidence and agreed assumptions about what would constitute evidence of God's existence.  Now you understand why the definition of God must come first. For example, if the definition of God included a being who created everything, then I the definition of evidence would be based on fulfilling this definition--there would have to be evidence that a being created everything--without including any opinion. But how can you remove opinion from this? Some people will say the beauty that can be found in the big picture and the little picture, the mountains and hills, the deserts, the great variety the world has to offer of plants, terrains, animals and people--the way the human body functions so well--couldn't have happened by hazard or by some eruption in the universe. But since no one remembers seeing the creation of things and evidence for them is wrapped up only things they've witnessed, they say there is no evidence. How can you remove your opinion from this?

For another part of a commonly used definition: God is all loving. For evidence of their being an all-loving being, some would say that the fact there are hardships in the world is evidence that there is no all-loving being because a loving being wouldn't allow hard things to happen to loved ones. But others would say that the existence of hardships is in itself evidence of a God because without hardships, life would be too easy, too boring, and there would be no opportunities for growth and learning. Then, for some, evidence would be the feeling they have when they pray or when they receive an answer to a prayer that is to them absolutely miraculous. But someone else would say that that's not evidence because they can't feel what the other person felt or they think that there must be another explanation because everything they've thought in the past to be a miracle turned out to have another explanation--or they've been led to believe this. Can you remove your opinion from this?

The fact is that all knowledge and beliefs are based on subjective experiences and acceptances of reality and truth. That's why the question is problematic.

Take this scenario for example. I've never been to China, but I believe there is a place on the earth called China. Why do I believe this? Because I've met people who say they are from China and I've heard them speaking something that isn't French or English. I've seen maps and globes and read news reports and history books and cultural studies. In any case, I've had a lot of evidence that there is a place called China, but none of the evidence I've seen is absolute proof. The fact is that my whole life could just be a dream of some sort by some greater being who's making me feel and think and see things for some unknown reason. Or it could be that there's some force--even a group of people--that are putting me through an experiment to see what people believe, and they've targeted all of my textbooks and news articles and the people I meet to shape me into believing there's this place called China. In my experience, though, it's my opinion that this isn't very likely--to the point of absurdity. Nonetheless, I can't remove the fact that it's my experiences that have led me to believe this. In short, it's really just my opinion that these evidences are sufficient, leading me to believe there is a place called China.

Can you see the parallels to heaven? My whole life has been filled with experiences, things I've read or heard, people that I've met, feelings that I've had, that lead me to believe there's a place called heaven where a loving, all powerful God, who created the universe--and many more, in fact--, and who is my Father and wants me to return home to Him. Can I prove it to you? No I can't give you the experiences I've had or make you feel what I've felt, so I can't give you the evidence that I have. I can explain it all in detail--I kind of have, actually, in 30 years of journal writing--but that won't fit into a five page paper.  And someone else will still say that that's not evidence because their experiences have led them to see things differently.  I can't remove my opinion that these experiences are evidence sufficient to leading me to believe there is a heaven and a God. And at the same time, nothing you show me that you call evidence of the contrary will satisfy me.

There is a God. In fact, there's more than just a god by the most simplest of definitions. There is plenty of evidence that He not only created us, the world, everything, but also that He sent His Son to live and to suffer and to die for us. Read the Bible, read the Book of Mormon, attend the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Make the changes in your life that He teaches you to make. And then pray sincerely wanting to see the evidence so that your life can be changed for the better. That's how you'll get your evidence, and you will get it. I promise.

Meeting Prophets and Other Great People

A Sunday School lesson last week got me thinking, perhaps particularly as it followed my sharing one of my stories only a week or two before. Since I didn't share my thoughts in that Sunday School class, and I have some thought-exploring to do on the subject, I thought I'd write in here.

I was just about to start with the first story of shaking hands and speaking to one, but I think I'll back track a bit. Since some might count such as memorable/noteworthy, I'll begin further back when I was first in the same room as a prophet. This would be Ezra Taft Benson when I was a teenager. He came to Fort Collins for a regional conference. My family and I were in the nosebleed section, but I did see him, and there did seem to be something special when he came in the room, but perhaps not quite as extraordinary as I'd been led to expect from the excitement of the adults at church. It was still a good experience. I love Pres. Benson. He said a lot of things during his time as prophet that greatly impacted my life in good ways, particularly his encouragement to read and study the Book of Mormon. But these talks were from general meetings that I either watched on the TV or at a church building. I don't remember what he said in Fort Collins.

We also had a handful of general authorities come to stake and regional conferences when I was growing up, I'm sure. The only one I really remember was Jacob De Jager who was a funny, clever Dutch man. I remember he talked about one of his first callings, perhaps the first, to pass out hymn books before sacrament meeting and how important that calling was. He also shared a lot about Jacob 6 in the Book of Mormon--"O be wise. What can I say more?"

When I went to BYU being in the same room as a prophet greatly lessened in rarity as we had firesides just about every month with either one of the First Presidency or Quorum of Twelve speaking. Occasionally it would be another authority, but quite often it was one of them. And if it was less than I remember, that would be because there were also frequent visits to our Tuesday morning devotionals by general authorities. I almost wrote lessened in significance, but that would be wrong. These events were highly significant to my growing testimony. I don't remember everything they said, but there are several talks that really hit a chord for me, answering prayers and questions that I had at the time. For example, I remember Pres. Hinckley talking about having a positive attitude and being optimistic at a time when I was struggling with depression. I remember Elder Oaks talking about what it means to judge people, defining it crisply and clearly. I remember Elder Scott looking into the cameras in such a way that he seemed to be looking right at me (from discussions with my peers after, I know many had this same impression), talking about God's love, about keeping a journal, about scripture study. And of course, there were plenty of talks about the importance of dating and marrying well.

As one of the firesides I attended was one given by Pres. Howard W. Hunter. This was while Pres. Benson was still the president of the church but was so ill, it was expected he would die soon and Pres. Hunter would become the president soon. This was the fireside at which a crazy man stormed the podium with a bomb threat (turned out, as we learned later, it was just a briefcase of books), trying to get Pres. Hunter to read his message instead of the one he'd planned. Pres. Hunter refused. The auditorium was first filled with tension, surprise and tears of worry, but it was soon taken over by the spirit as angels began to sing and the audience picked up on it, singing hymns. I don't remember what the hymns were, but it was either I am a Child of God or We Thank Thee O God for a Prophet--or perhaps both. I just remember the Spirit. When the situation was handled and the bomb-man evacuated, Pres. Hunter picked up and talked eloquently about handling adversity--so perfect.

One might think these experiences of hearing these great men speak would be sufficient to secure my testimony. And it probably was, but I was still blessed again.

While I was at BYU, I worked at the Special Education Seminary as a janitor, then an editor and miscellaneous helper, and then as secretary. This godsend of a job brought me a few other opportunities. One was a special CES fireside--not the big ones they've had since, just a relatively small one for employees in a regular chapel. At this time, Pres. Henry B. Eyring was the Church's Commissioner of Education, and he was the keynote speaker. So being at this fireside, I got to hear him speak in a relatively small room compared to those I'd experienced thus far with general authorities. Of course, at the time, he wasn't a prophet, but I do remember being very moved and impressed by the Spirit from his talk.

The second opportunity the employment provided was the opportunity to meet Pres. Boyd K. Packer. (Elder at the time) One of the teachers at the seminary was Pres. Packer's grandson, John, a very humble and sweet young man. Of course once I found out he was single and a prophet's grandson, my interest piqued a bit more, but to no avail. He soon was dating and then marrying another one of the teachers, Jody, a sweet girl. I did, however, receive an invitation to their reception, which was in either in the grandson's parents' or in Pres. Packer's backyard. (I don't remember). I do, however, remember very well that I drove up to Salt Lake with one of my friends from the seminary, a teacher who also happened to be my next-door neighbor, Wendy McNair. We were both a bit intimidated, but we mustered the courage to go over to the corner of the lawn where we could see Pres. Packer standing so that we could talk to him and shake his hand. He was very polite and kind. That's what I remember of the meeting itself, but more importantly, I remember that from that point all the way back to Provo--so an hour or so, I felt the Spirit so strongly, it was amazing. Nothing else could explain the feeling of peace, love, and light that I felt on that drive home. It couldn't be confused with being in love with anyone--there were no eligible men there that I remember. It was just amazing, one of the best short experiences of my life.

A couple years later as I was preparing for my mission, Satan worked pretty hard on me with feelings of depression, discouragement, and doubt. I can't say that I looked back on that meeting to push me through. I don't remember that, at least. But I pushed forward, got myself into the MTC in spite of it all, and even in the midst of it. That is, the MTC, too, had its challenges.

Once again, I was in an environment with fairly frequent visits from general authorities. I don't remember much about what they said or who all came other than one. Pres. Hunter signed my mission call, but since he didn't live long once called, Pres. Hinckley had become the president of the Church while I was waiting to enter the MTC.  And yes, he came to visit us. Being a popular prophet, there was a lot of buzz and excitement surrounding his visit. But my district was a little more blessed than some in that not only did we get to hear him speak --in the same room for those to whom that is significant--but it also so happened that we were out front when he was leaving the premises, so, along with a fairly large handful of other missionaries who were out, we gathered round to shake his hand.

If you know me, you might know that I'm not a fan of crowds. Too many people is overwhelming to me. But it wasn't until years later that I realized this was part of my personality. I was just down and struggling with my mood and so many things. In the hubbub, I pushed my hand through to shake the prophet's hand, which he obliged, but somewhat reluctantly as, I suppose, it probably seemed to him a disembodied hand--he couldn't tell whose it was. I stayed standing there afterward though, perhaps a bit dumbstruck or not sure what to do with myself. I'm not sure. As the crowd thinned a bit, he looked into my eyes but didn't say anything. I thought he was probably wondering why my hand wasn't extended, too, or perhaps he was wondering if mine was the disembodied hand. I don't know. But it was a very awkward moment. I didn't feel the Spirit at the time let alone for an hour afterward. I just felt very foolish.

I believe that some others in that crowd, though, did have the experience I'd had with Pres. Packer a couple years prior as there was quite the buzz in our classroom for what felt like days afterward with the elders in my district nearly squealing with excitement about shaking the prophet's hand. Their giddiness made me smile, but inwardly the shame continued. And in fact, more than 22 years later, yes, last week in Sunday School, when the question came up about meeting a prophet, this experience resounded in my head. Why didn't I feel the Spirit when I shook not just a prophet but THE prophet's hand? Was it because I was a bad missionary? because I wasn't supposed to be on a mission? Or something else?

Well, I don't know how to define "bad" missionary. I certainly wasn't perfect, but I wasn't going out of my way to break rules or commandments purposely either. And I'd had a handful of experiences and blessings to confirm I was supposed to be on a mission. So that leaves something else. Then what? Here is where my thought-exploring comes in.

1. Obviously not everyone has an overwhelming experience of the Spirit whenever they meet a prophet or even the prophet, president. If that were the case, there would be tons more people joining the Church. This understanding is helpful, I think for a lot of people--so they don't judge others or themselves.

2. The prophet isn't Jesus. He's His mouthpiece, true, but the prophet is still a mortal man. Perhaps Pres. Hinckley wasn't exuding the Spirit as much at that time, like perhaps he'd had a bad day.

3. Perhaps I wasn't as pure of a vessel as I'd been 2 years before. Back then, my purpose was not to shake Pres. Packer's hand so I could go back home and tell everyone about it. Of course, it's not that I wanted to do that with Pres. Hinckley either, but perhaps I was fighting against the idea of joining the crowd. I couldn't be seen not shaking his hand, but I wasn't anxious to go shouting out that I'd shaken the prophet's hand either. And where's the middle ground? I don't know---I might tend to get all kinds of confusing feelings when there are crowds, too many people. So, maybe it was just a personality thing.

4. Perhaps it was an experience to confirm the Spirit I'd felt when I shook Pres. Packer's hand--affirming that those feelings were not something I could generate on my own. That is, if ever I would want to feel the Spirit after doing something, wouldn't it be when shaking THE prophet's hand? But I couldn't make myself feel it, so when I felt it before with Pres. Packer, it wasn't because I was making myself, because I wanted to feel that way.

There are probably other reasons to consider that I haven't come up with, but I think this is a good start if not conclusive. I think I wanted to share this in Sunday School, but, as you can see, it's a bit complex for a simple comment. Nonetheless, I do hope people understand some of the principles, particularly in light of the questions that led to this pondering in Sunday School. Who are the noble and great ones? What does it feel like to meet one?

Some other commenters in class, I believe, helped with this too by pointing out that the noble and great ones are not just the prophets and apostles. Those who hear the voice of the Lord and follow it, who don't harden their hearts, are the noble and great ones. That could be you. I hope it's me. They are women and men and children, Blacks, Whites, Yellows, and everything in between. They are nursery leaders and maintenance workers, as well as leaders and teachers. God needs all of us.

I'm grateful to live in a time when prophets are once again on the earth, when the fulness of the gospel has been restored, and I know that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is Jesus's true church on the earth. I am so grateful for his leaders, their worthiness and ability to help me understand God's will. I'm also grateful for my callings, my friends, my family members, and all the people God uses to touch my life. In Jesus' name, amen.

Murmuring, Complaining, and Puss

Last week I had this little sore on my inner thigh acting up—it's been coming and going a lot over the past couple years. And then, I also have had this mouth thing going on. To explain, a few weeks ago I had a tooth extracted because it was seriously infected and then this week I got the temporary bridge put in, but it's still kind of been hurting. 

With such physical wounds, the temptation is to squeeze all of the puss out. With the thigh, I could do that to some extent, but not with the tooth, which got to be a bit frustrating. This might, though, have led me to think about what really does get infections out. See the fact is that although it does help to squeeze puss out sometimes, one should only do so in a sterile and safe environment, not around other people that could get sick or without cleansing agents to prevent reinfecting or spreading the wound.  But more than that, the greater remedy comes from taking an antibiotic.

So, other than the direct reason, why is it important to understand how to get rid of infections? Well, it can make for a nice analogy, that's why.  Having infections on the brain led me to think about the times when I feel like I have a spiritual infection, just pain in my heart and my soul.  When one has spiritual wounds, it’s very tempting to “vent” as we like to call it these days—just shout out all of the things we hate about our lives and the world and our problems--complaining, basically. But doing this is like squeezing out the puss in an unsafe environment, and so it can end up getting a lot of other people sick, and spread the infection more deeply in ourselves. Along the same lines, I like the quote by Neal Maxwell from his October 1989 conference address, "Murmur Not": "Letting off steam always produces more heat than light." (He has a number of other good things to say in that talk, too.)

Instead of venting or letting off steam, what should we do, then?  We need a spiritual antibiotic. We need to apply the atoning blood of Jesus Christ to heal the wound. Jesus is the antibiotic who heals all wounds. Sometimes it takes a while for the wound to heal, and we might need to clean out the puss, dead skin, etc., from time to time, but we need to do so in a sterile environment, like through prayer, or in a journal that is just between us and the Savior.  And then we also have to clean it, with other things the Lord has provided to help us use His Atonement, like prayer (again), the scriptures, hymns, church attendance, temple attendance, serving others, etc.--all of the Sunday School answers.

You might be saying that this is all well and good, but sometimes your wounds are too large and you really need to talk about them. I don't disagree. I don't think the commandment not to murmur is the same thing as saying don't talk about your problems. Solutions to big problems would never come if we didn't talk about them. It's just the attitude, the complaining, that is the problem. And, admittedly, some bigger sicknesses, like some big sicknesses of the world, while they still require the Savior’s atonement, in those cases, Jesus might need to be a stronger drug than an antibiotic, more like a hospital. Perhaps that might go along with the analogy others have made that the Church is a hospital.

So, since having this analogy come to mind, I’ve started thinking of people when they are venting as having "puss mouth," (just in my head). It's helped me to see them more clearly as being sick. But also, thinking about it now, the analogy can go further. If someone is cleaning out a pussy wound in front of you, what do you do? Well, since most of us learned as children that this isn't healthy, our instinct has come to be to walk away (though many still like to keep in visual range). This isn't a bad idea--to stay away, that is. But sometimes we have to be there. Many doctors have to be in hospitals to help people heal. But what do they do before treating people? They do what they can to immunize themselves--washing their hands, wearing gloves and masks, etc. Likewise, if we know we have to encounter a hostile situation beforehand, we can read the scriptures and pray both before and after. 

Curiously enough, I had such a situation this week. A situation where I knew I'd be facing a person the following day that I was fairly certain would not be happy with the things I had to say, as this person hadn't been happy with the things I'd said the day before that caused us to need to meet. But I prayed fervently the night before and the morning of, and things went okay. Yes, it was a very sad situation. The person was very hostile--full of puss mouth--but the Lord helped me to know what to say to help heal this person. The healing wasn't immediate, but I did actually receive an apology a couple days later. I feel very blessed to have had that experience to better help me as it is likely to happen again. (It tends to come with the territory of teaching a required Gen. Ed course at the college level. Tensions run high.) 

Now, the fact is that I'm human, and it did affect me still, and I can't say that I'll be perfect from now on avoiding complaining or venting, etc. But with the Lord's help, I know I can become better each time. In Jesus' name, I hope.

A Rainy Day

 A few months ago I noticed that a life insurance policy was taking money out of my bank every month, and it seemed to have started around the time I had my hysterectomy. I know, that’s been a year and a half, so you know how good I am at paying close attention to my bank. Shhh. Well, anyway, I didn’t remember signing anything so that I could have life insurance, but thought maybe I had while I was out of it during that period of time. Anyway, thinking it might have been one of those things that the Credit Union sends out every once in a while with the option for cheaper life insurance through their connection, I asked them to cancel it.

http://tribune.com.pk/story/887603/annual-report-2014-life-insurance-industry-in-private-sector-surges-35-8/

They didn’t know what it was, said it wasn’t them. They suggested I find out who it was, but I couldn’t remember, so I just told them to cancel. Since I’m fairly irregular about checking my messages in my bank, this conversation lasted a few months. It wasn't a big deal to me. Everything else looked fine in the bank.

Now, a few weeks ago I get this letter from the company I have my eye insurance through saying the bank had rejected their withdrawal. And, uh, what was their name?

http://www.totalben.com/Documents/vision.html

Yes, they were held under a life insurance company. Uh-oh. On the plus side, I probably had noticed their withdrawals earlier than that few months ago, like when they changed hands and started being under a life insurance company. Phew. I'm not that bad at checking my accounts. And another plus, I’d been meaning to cancel them anyway. I used to have all of my health insurance through the National Association for the Self Employed (NASE), but a year and a half ago, or something like that, the health insurance company quit on me, stopped doing business for people who'd started in Virginia. Never mind that I live in Colorado now, I started in Virginia, so bye bye Heidi. We're not covering you any more.

NASE still had my eye insurance and accidental dismembership or something like that, though, and since I wear glasses, I've kind of needed them. Still, with the fees for NASE plus the eye insurance and other insurance thingy, I was paying a lot more per month than I really needed, especially since NASE membership didn't really do much for me. My self employment, well, it's not like I'm a start-up company or have employees or anything. I sell Avon very occasionally and proofread from home.

https://thenounproject.com/term/cancel/542176/

Anyway, so I just needed the impetus to get it all cancelled and find eye insurance somewhere else. So, since my eye insurance was essentially cancelled anyway, I went looking for how to cancel my NASE membership and finally succeeded this week. Yea! And guess what? Today was the last effective date.  So, last night I actually went online and applied for some vision and dental insurance, so that’s in process.

Now, coming to day, it seems pretty good timing because I kind of need new glasses, like right now.

Okay, backtracking just a little more again. (Don't worry; we're almost there!) My glasses frames have been annoying for quite a while in that since I had the lenses replaced a year ago, one of the screws has never been able to hold the lens in very well. I'm constantly tightening it. So, today, after church, it came loose again, but the lens and the screw popped all the way out shortly after I started driving home. Since I couldn't screw it back in while I was driving, couldn't even find the screw at first, I just kept driving and figured I'd take care of it when I got home. I'm not blind, fortunately.

But as I continued driving, the rain came down heavier and heavier so that it was pouring when I got home. I reached in back and grabbed my umbrella, put my church bag and purse on my arm, and then held my lens, my frames, and the screw (which I'd fortunately found on my chest), in one hand and the umbrella and my keys in the other. Can you guess what happened next?

As I stepped up onto the curve by the driveway, my lens fell out of my hand into the gutter with rapidly moving water. I saw it and tried picking it up but it slipped out of my hand and then I lost sight of it as it moved its way down the streaming gutter. Well, I tried a little to look for it, but in the pouring rain, in a dress and heels, and with my hands full, plus no glasses to see well, my efforts were somewhat hopeless. So I went inside to unload and then came back out to feel around in the gutter at all the junctures where it might have gotten caught.

I felt and saw nothing all the way to where it drained into the canal, including between the two high fenced yards with only the gutter between them. I walked down this stretch, trying to balance on one side or giving up and just walking in the gutter, feeling the ucky, grimy water ooze into my nice church shoes and between my toes.

Still, after all that, no lens. But I will add, just so you know, we're not a terrible neighborhood. In addition to their one neighbor cop, we have another cop a few more doors down, and their other neighbor is a nice man who's outside quite a bit--our personal neighborhood watchman, and he offered to help.

https://www.pinterest.com/pharesmckinzy/blame-it-on-the-rain/

Anyway, my dad and mom both came out and tried to help me find the lens, too, but with no success for a while. Then as the rain let up a bit, my dad finally found my lens on a little sand bank maybe 10 feet downstream from where I'd dropped it. Yea!

But the story isn't over yet. We still had to get the lens into the frames. My dad has a bunch of screwdrivers and he got some tweezers and started working on it. But then, while I was in the bathroom, the screw fell on the floor. All three of us looked and looked, and we used a heavy-duty magnet all over the floor. And in the end, no screw.  Insane!

http://imablog.net/archives/2015/08/broken-glasses.html

Luckily I have a pair of backup glasses with only a slightly outdated lenses,
Or should I go with the duck tape look?

Wow, what a crazy day! Let’s just hope I get that eye insurance approved and soon!


What life lessons do you think can come from this?


--all images except the one of me are from Creative Commons license search through Google, with respective sites noted below.

The Mystery Drama BINGO game

Scooby Doo got many of us hooked as kids to the mystery genre of TV shows. But have they really gotten any better since our childhood?  We might not hear, "And I would have gotten away with ti, too, if it weren't for these meddling kids!" as much any more, but we still here the same lines pretty often. So, I got to thinking: I'm not likely to stop watching these shows any time soon, but at least I could have some fun with the boring cliches they use!

Enter the BINGO card you've all been waiting for. Of course, you won't hear all of these in one episode, but perhaps over the course of a week, if you watch them regularly enough, or perhaps if you binge watch a particular show, after five or six episodes, you can have a good game. I doubt, though, that you'll have to watch an entire season before someone wins, even if you go for blackout. Prove me wrong.

To play, someone on the show, either a cop or a suspect has to say something to this effect, even if the words aren't exact. The statement doesn't have to prove true at the end (For example, the butler might no have done it, but you can still mark the space if someone guesses during the show that the butler did it.).

Here are my suggested card spots. You can use any of a number of online BINGO card generators.

And I would have gotten away with it too if it weren’t for…, 

Do you have children?, 

Everything happened so fast, 

He’s a rogue agent (he’s gone rogue), 

I can’t have a family with a job like this, 

I know my rights, 

I know who did it!, 

I needed the money,

I want my lawyer, 

I was just doing my job, 

I’ve got your back, 

It was an accident, 

It wasn’t my fault, 

It’s always the (spouse), 

Let us help you,

My (family member) would never…, 

No one was supposed to get hurt, 

The butler did it, 

We can catch bigger fish with (this suspect), 

We’re all hanging out at the bar after work, 

You have no idea what it’s like, 

You need a drink, 

You’ll never get away with it, 

You’re too close to this, 

The Cup of Water

Last week I started teaching pre-school again after a few years of trying other endeavors. I feel fortunate to have this opportunity. And I might have lots to say eventually, but there is one story from my first day that was particularly noteworthy, I think. When I teach French at the Montessori, I usually have a group time activity—a book, a song, a lesson, sometimes a combination thereof. Then for the rest of the day, I take groups of three or four students at a time to play games—bingo-type, dominoes, matching, slap variation--working on specific vocabulary areas. Of course, there’s also outside time, afternoon snack, and general observing to assure good behavior of the other kids around me.

So, for the first day, with the first group, we played  a couple of bingo-type games, the first three children and I. Then those children went off to find other work, and three more children came. To mix things up, I pulled out a matching game. Well, one of the girls from the first group wanted to play the matching game. But given the number of students in the class, I couldn’t let her join the group this time. Telling her this, though, led to weeping and wailing amidst repeated asking and telling me how much she wanted to play the matching game.

Fortunately, eventually that passed. We moved onto another group and played more bingo, and she moved on to work on other things. 

Nap time came and went, along with outside time, during which time the kids had a snack and a cup of water.  It is important to note that the water was brought in by the children’s parents because of the unknown quality of the faucet water due to the recent flooding.

When they came back inside, we had a much smaller group, but this also meant that I was the only teacher for the 3-5 year-old group, so I wasn’t easily able to ask simple questions. Of course Barb was still there in the toddler room, but I hated to bother her for little things. So when the children were thirsty after their time outdoors, I didn’t know what the rules were about giving them more water from the donations. But it did seem natural to me that they be thirsty after being outside where it was warm. So I filled the pitcher from morning snack time with water and set out some cups, and as individuals asked me, I told them they could get a cup of water and sit down at a clean table away from the toys where the other children were playing and working.

Unfortunately, this method had children overfilling their cups, including the little girl who had wanted so badly to play the matching game that morning. Both she and another girl ended up spilling their cups, so I gave them the sponge and rag so they could clean up their own mess, as is the policy in the school. Well, the other little girl cleaned up her spill without a problem and went on her way, but the girl who’d been crying that morning broke down again into weeping and wailing about how thirsty she was. Based on the experience from the morning with the French game, I naturally didn’t take her too seriously, so I let her just get it out of her system for a while.

It went on for quite a while, though, and Barb came out from the toddler room to see if everything was okay. I explained briefly, and she was satisfied. And eventually, the little girl calmed down, in part because I told her I would let her have another drink if she would calm down. Sometimes I can be firm, but I’m not all together heartless. So, when she calmed down, I let her get another cup, but told her not to fill her cup very full, just a little. She followed my instructions well, only filling the cup half full (or leaving it half empty?). But the next thing I knew, she’d spilled this cup, too, which, of course, brought on another flood of tears. She didn’t say anything this time, though, perhaps just frustrated with the situation and reconciling herself to the fact that today was just a bad day.  

And so now, my heart started really going out to her. I rubbed her back and showed my understanding to her, explaining I knew today was just a bad day. She agreed. Of course, this was in English, since I needed her to understand. When she calmed down, I wanted to give her some more water. But by this point, though, there was only a very little bit of water left in the pitcher. Fortunately no one else was asking, though, so I filled her cup with the last little bit of water, and she did her best to put on a happy face for the rest of the afternoon.

The most curious thing about the day, though, happened later that evening when I was reading the scriptures with my parents. We were in Matthew, and it just so happened that I was the one to read as we reached the end of Chapter 10, where it reads, “And whosoever shall give to drink unto one of these little ones a cup of cold water only in the name of a disciple, verily I say unto you, he shall in no wise lose his reward.”

After the first water spill, particularly given the French game incident earlier that day, I admit I was inclined not to let her have another cup. After the second, I could have easily just said that there wasn’t enough water. There really wasn’t much. But the Lord touched my heart, reminding me that I need to treat these children as a good mother would, as I would treat my nieces and nephews—in short, as Jesus himself would. And though a few drops it was, the Lord helped me make the right decision. For as the scriptures also say, by small and simple things, great things shall come to pass. The little girl will trust me, and I can remember to soften my heart towards the little children.

Americans Need to Have a Foreign Language Requirement During Compulsory Education

Having been a composition teacher in local colleges and universities for the past three years, I have participated in many online and in-person conversations among employers and teachers that corroborate the experiences I’ve had with a number of my students. The fact is that America’s public education system is on the decline. Grades are inflated, and requirements have been reduced to the point that students are under-prepared both for college, for the workforce, and even for real life. I’m sure you have heard this point of view, but I’m not writing just to complain but to provide a piece of the solution. While many of the ideas toward solutions that seem to find their way to implementation have some sense—focus on math and science, and hurting both teachers and students through by having teachers teach answers to mandatory tests—these efforts only treat some of the symptoms and will not provide long-term results. Having required foreign language classes in our public school system, however, would help our students improve their intelligence, and better prepare them for the workforce and for a broader real world than many of the intelligent Americans by whom high standards have been set in the past.

Although I would not dictate that we only require Spanish, the growing Hispanic population in the U.S. would lend significant support to the argument. Certainly if a language were required, many students would choose Spanish, recognizing the improved job potential this would bring to them. Additionally, more Spanish speaking Americans would mean more help for these immigrants to integrate socially and to find work. Thus both the natural-born Americans and the immigrants would improve their work opportunities as students broaden their understanding of the culture and language of this growing segment of our population.

However, as noted, I would not make Spanish the requirement because Americans would greatly benefit from a wider range of language abilities.  For one, as with the situation with Spanish, work opportunities abound for speakers of Arabic, French, Japanese, Chinese, and many other languages. And this need will only increase in years to come. The jobs of interpreters and translators, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, are “expected to grow 42 percent from 2010 to 2020, much faster than the average for all occupations.”  Plus, jobs that involve some translating have some perks. According to Salary.com, “Language differentials typically range between 5 and 20 percent per hour more than the base rate.” These statistics seem to hint quite loudly that America needs more speakers of foreign languages. Furthermore, because I worked in the Foreign Service Institute of the State Department for nearly five years (2002-2007), the first field of jobs that actually comes to my mind in regard to need for foreign language speakers is that of foreign diplomacy. We will always need highly qualified workers in our embassies and consulates, as well as in our DC offices, particularly those with language skills.

But while the economic interests are quite compelling, they are not the only reason. Our public employees are not the only diplomats who will influence our public relations. American tourists have a strong need of cultural sensitization to ensure and improve our ties with all nations.  Many Americans enjoy traveling, but while most may tend to stay within the U.S. for their vacations, many still have business or family-related needs to travel abroad as well as a desire to see both natural wonders and cultural phenomena in exotic locales. And these wander lusters need to be able to communicate and appreciate aspects of their hosts’ cultures other than the art that originally drew them there. I have heard too many stories of property destruction and other utter rudeness. For example, recently an ignorant American, who, as Matt Peckham reports in Time, “wasn’t drunk, being belligerent…or whatever other wild imagery your brain might conjure” vandalized the 600-year-old “Annunciazione” in Florence, Italy. Peckham goes on to say, “The reportedly 55-year-old Missouri native was simply trying to measure the statue’s pinky finger.” While the man might not have needed to speak Italian to know better, if he had learned from his youth to appreciate other cultures, such as through mandatory foreign language learning, I would think he might have learned some other rules of cultural etiquette in the process. In fact, in a 2007 NEA report “The Benefits of Second Language Study”, they quote Helena Curtain and Carol Ann Dahlberg in their 2004 Languages and Children: Making the

Match: New Languages for Young Learners, Grades K-8, saying,  “(E)xposure to a foreign language serves as a means of helping children to intercultural competence. The awareness of a global community can be enhanced when children have the opportunity to experience involvement with another culture through a foreign language.” Clearly the studies of language and culture do go hand in hand.

But even among the somewhat cultural savvy of the tourists, there still exists an enormous error in thought—that Europeans all speak English.  According to a 2005 report by the European Commission, although English is the most common foreign language learned on their continent, only 34% of Europeans claim to speak it with any degree of fluency. Of course the percentage might be higher in the capitals and other metropolitan centers, particularly at famous museums and the like where they will have hired or trained personnel who can cater to tourists’ language needs. I would definitely not, however, expect many of the pedestrians to speak English, nor all shop owners or train station attendants.  And even if they did, the utter egotism of expecting that people will want to speak in our language in their country does not help America’s international relations.  Culture sensitization that comes from language learning, in addition to the benefit of actually learning the desired languages, will help even if a student does not travel to a country where he or she speaks the particular language.

And curiously enough, in addition to the natural cultural knowledge that accompanies language learning, general intelligence also increases. Studies do show that learning a foreign language will make students smarter. In the article, “Why Bilinguals Are Smarter” from the New York Times, Yudhijit Bhattacharjee says, “The key difference between bilinguals and monolinguals may be more basic: a heightened ability to monitor the environment.”  Then later, he adds, “In a study comparing German-Italian bilinguals with Italian monolinguals on monitoring tasks, Mr. Costa [from the University of Pompeu Fabra in Spain] and his colleagues found that the bilingual subjects not only performed better, but they also did so with less activity in parts of the brain involved in monitoring, indicating that they were more efficient at it.” If students are required to learn a foreign language while they are still in their formative years, we can certainly imagine how they will be benefited by becoming more efficient at monitoring their environment—from noticing cultural norms to performing job-related multi-tasking, to simple improving their traffic behavior. Everyone will benefit from this requirement.

But wait, there’s more! In the 2007 NEA report noted earlier, they summarize the College Board’s 2004 findings saying that “Students who completed at least four years of foreign-language study scored more than 100 points higher on each section of the SAT than students who took a half year or less.” Since test scores are of such importance to our current education system, this seems highly significant. But speaking to the broader reason for these scores—that we want intelligent students, not just those who know test answers, the NEA also reports that “Strong evidence shows that time spent on foreign language study strongly reinforces the core subject areas of reading, English language literacy, social studies and math. Foreign language learners consistently outperform control groups in core subject areas on standardized tests, often significantly.” Considering the knowledge I have seen students bring to my college English classrooms, I know they could benefit from improvements not only in language literacy but in social studies as well. I have had too many college students who admitted to thinking Abraham Lincoln was our nation’s first president, let alone not knowing anything more about George Washington than that he had white hair (that he wore a wig was even a surprise to them). They need these improvements in their education. This kind of ignorance simply cannot continue.

If you’re still not convinced of our need for foreign language literacy, let’s take a look at Europe, a greater community of multi-linguists and one whose culture is somewhat similar to ours. Although we are not as closely geographically connected to as many countries as are the countries in Europe, we can still learn some things from their trends and policies regarding foreign languages. For example, many Europeans learn not just one but at least two foreign languages. A 2009 Eurostat report indicates that “60% of students in upper secondary education study two or more foreign languages.” For business reasons, this makes perfect sense due to their proximity to other countries as well as the cooperative ties associated with the European Union. Of course we don’t have the number of foreign-speaking countries bordering us as most European countries, it does seem important that we remain competitive with them as we also conduct business with these countries.

But there is a somewhat stronger appeal. Even those Europeans who don’t go into business benefit from their multilingual background because they are better able to understand and to communicate as they travel.  For example, while some people might not have decided to go into business, their spouses might have, leading to their need to relocate abroad.  Additionally, some countries have seen economic downturns and wars that force many of their citizens out. In all of these situations, having multiple languages under their belts would be a tremendous advantage. So again, while it is true that we are not Europe--we have seen difficult economic times, but not sufficient to send too many out of the country; we have had wars, but most have been fought on foreign soil—couples do unite with different backgrounds and needs for relocation. But more importantly, while yes, we have been blessed with much peace and security, can we guarantee this will always be the case?

Since the studies and statistics have made it apparent that foreign language learning will benefit Americans in our economy, our international relations, and our general intelligence, I fail to see any further justification for not requiring that our students learn a foreign language during their compulsory education. Our workforce demands it, our international relations demand it, and our people as a whole cannot continue to thrive without it.

Giving and Preparation and Learning and The Creation and stuff

I haven't been blogging much lately, mostly waiting until the end of the year for the final shakedown. But I felt during church today that I need to blog a bit more. I had a handful of things running through my head that I wanted to blog about. And as the day has worn on, more things have come to me.

The thought I have in mind right now came as I was driving home listening to The RM CD, some modernized old children's songs, hymns, and Janice Kapp Perry tunes. On came "Give Said the Little Stream," a song that has unfortunately gotten a little of a bad rap because it's not as doctrinal as many of the other children's songbook songs. But I think a little injustice was done the song. It does have some good values--true perhaps not as good as some others--but still an important lesson, that of giving. As I listened to the song, I thought about all that water gives. It gives and it gives--water to help the plants grow, water to help us keep clean, to name the two most important. But what does water want or need? Does it need the algae at the bottom of the lake? Does it need the plants? Does it need people? Not for its existence, nope. For it to stay clean, perhaps, but it only gets polluted because of people, so that's kind of circular. What does water need to exist? Two hydrogen molecules and an oxygen molecule. In other words, it really only needs God. Its function is to give.

Then this led me to think about the order of creation, from Genesis. Wasn't water one of the first things? Well, no, actually. It was just there.
1. In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
2. And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. 
3. And God said, Let there be light and there was light.
4. And God saw the light, that it was good: and God divided the light from the darkness.
5. And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.

But we did need to have gravity to keep it one spot, so God gave us gravity:

6. And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.
7. And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament: and it was so.
8. And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.

And then, as the story goes, you know, we got land, because everything He created after would need land. And then He created grass and plants and stuff because his other creations would need plants. And then we got the sun, moon, and stars because everything needs to rest and have light to get work done. And then He brought forth all of the animals because we would need animals for many, many reasons to live. And then came us. In short, little by little, He brought forth everything that would be needed before it was actually needed, so it would be ready for the creatures, plants, and ultimately the people who would need it. And of course, we were the final creation before He rested because everything created up to the end was created for us because we'd needed. We're the reason for all the creations.

But that's not the end of the lesson. Is Give Said the Little Stream just about how nice water is just to give to us all the time? No, of course not. It's an object lesson. The obvious lesson is that we're supposed to give, too. If we want to become like our Father in Heaven who has given us EVERYTHING, then we need to give, too. But it does go further still. He prepared everything for us that we'd need before we needed it. And it was well organized and planned out. That's the nature of God. He is a God of order. And since He's the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow, then we can expect that He'll prepare everything we need still--such as the work that I need right now.

This reminds me of a little incident many years ago when I was visiting my sister and she was working on preparing lunch for her little boy. He was sitting in his chair crying and almost bawling that he wanted his food. He wasn't a baby, so he could talk and could have exercised a little patience, but he was still little, so it was understandable. Nonetheless, what he would have seen if he had turned around was that his mother was working on it the whole time and it was almost ready. He might have thought he needed it "right now" but he also needed to learn some patience. Just like we do. The Lord is preparing things and we'll have what we need when we need it, but in meantime, we can learn a little patience and as we're older, sometimes more than patience--lots of other lessons to be learned. Of course, it goes a step further, too. When we give, it's important for us to plan and be organized so that we aren't too hasty and end up not being as helpful as we otherwise could be.